You're not crazy...you're stupid.

For the past two weeks (hence the lack of blog activity) I have been slowly getting....stupider. And yes, I realize that "stupider" is not a real word...but it's the only thing that seems fitting for how I feel. This all really hit me around a week ago. It started with forgetting random little things---my school pass, my computer charger... my lipgloss (i get so self-conscoious with bare lips). Then I started to misplace BIG things...my credit card, my workout card, my drivers license, my fob key...I think I called Starbucks three times last week asking what their lost-in-found sitch looked like. Not ok.

Normally, I'm an extremely organized person. I double-triple check I have everything before I leave. I orally command the curling iron off. And the oven (it actually really works). Hell, I'm even prescribed to adderoll (no, I will not sell any to you). So you would THINK this kind of shit would be completely avoidable. Well, for some reason.....even my adderoll was like "sorry not gonna help you." It's funny, all this time I thought taking those magical pills made you smart. Truth is, that is only if you are smart. If you are dumb....it just makes you really effin focused on being dumb. This is so not ok, either.

Luckily, there is an actual legit scientific explanation for all of this.. There are two key hormones in our brain that have to do with stress: adrenaline and cortisol. On an everyday basis, in order for our brains to have the ability to function properly, cortisol levels remain relatively low. However, when we are stressed, and cortisol levels elevate...it can literally freeze the brain's critical abilities. It can also have an aversive affect on learning new things, intaking information, and memory. Greaaaaaaaaat. 

Since I love happy endings, none of this crap cortisol crap is permanent (unless you are naturally dumb, and with that I can't help you) The solutions are pretty boring, but completely attainable.

1) Keep a healthy diet --plenty of fruits and veggies. Try and stay away from refined carbs. (white rice, white bread, sugary sodas, cookies...basically anything that has flavor.)

2) drink a lot of water

3) Vitamin B and Vitamin C (i love those Emergen-C packets)

4) exercise --its bikini season anyway

5) Drink one half bottle of Pino Grigio (this one may be controversial amongst the experts...but what do they know? )

"Cher's main thrill in life is a makeover, it gives her a sense of control in a world full of chaos."